Pepper screamed and jerked away. The woman jerked forward, suddenly limp. Her eyes fell out of her head and her nose fell off. The cat melted into her lap. Pepper shrieked and tried to pull away. Teeth suddenly appeared out of the concrete, at least 5 feet long.
“WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON!??!?!” This had only happened one other time. And that was in a movie. Pepper took her knife out of the sheath at her hip and sawed through the old lady’s arm, which had turned to some unidentified sticky substance. She broke free and ran as a horrid piranha like creature emerged, breaking a huge hole in the concrete. It roared and leaped after the sprinting girl.
“Help! Help! Somebody step on it!” she cried, running away as fast as she can. She didn’t even want to know what happened to the old lady.
Suddenly she saw a pickup pulling out of the driveway to a bar.
“Wait for me!” she yelled, seeing people in the back. The creature was gaining, and Pepper was tiring.
A dude with a cigarette and a mustache waved at her. She reached the pickup and scrambled up into the back.
“Gosh, thanks for saving me.” She gasped. The people just blinked at her. They looked like rednecks, so they could probably help her get to Texas.
The pickup roared to life and began driving at 2 miles per hour, the average speed of a Los Angeles vehicle.
“COME ON!” the driver yelled to the millions of cars surrounding him. “MOVE IT!”
Pepper looked back at the creature. It was gone, totally gone. Probably got bored of the sea of cars.
“You person.” The cigarette guy was apparently addressing her. “What is your name?”
“Pepper.” Pepper said simply.
“Nice. You can sit in the cab.”
“uhh….” How would she get INTO the cab? The car was moving if even so slow it would lose a race against molasses running uphill in January in Alaska. The mustachio opened the little window in the back and motioned for her to enter. Okkkkaaaayyyyyy. She scrambled ungracefully through the tiny window and landed in a heap on the leather seat.
“FAIL!” the driver said. Pepper realized it was the emo kid. WHAT THE HECK!?!? Oh well.
She looked around the cab. It was a 5-seater and rather nice. The emo kid was driving and a blonde girl was sitting shotgun. She had pink glasses, same as Pepper. Pepper sat in the middle of the back seat and buckled up quietly.
“Who are the guys in the back?” she asked finally.
“I have no clue.” Emo boy said. “They were all napping in the back when I came out of depresso-mart (my favorite place to shop) and said they needed a ride to Texas. So I said okay.”
“Why?”
“I was bored.”
“Um, wow… And why did you give me this knife?”
“It got apple juice on it.”
“APPLE JUICE?!” Pepper gaped. “I thought it was blood.”
“Nope.” Emo kid shook his head. “I just hate apple juice.”
“Um, thanks. It kind of saved my life.”
“Cool.”
“I’m Pepper.”
“I’m Payne.”
“Pain?”
“Spelled ‘P-a-y-n-e’”
“Wow. That’s weird. Can I just call you…. Joe?”
Emo kid/Payne/Joe looked a bit disappointed his emo name wasn’t as catchy as he had formerly thought, but he nodded.
The blonde girl turned around suddenly.
“Hi!” she said. “I’m Flitter!”
“Flitter?” Pepper echoed.
The blonde girl nodded.
“Um, okay. That’s nice, I guess.”
The blonde girl turned toward the front, and Joe appeared to be sulking emotistically again, so Pepper did what any normal American person who had just wandered the streets of L.A, been attacked by her mom, and then chased by an imaginary monster that she had formerly thought an old person would do. She brushed her hair and then went to sleep.
Friday, April 9, 2010
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
The Author part 2
Yay! Everyone celebrate.
Bean rushed into a gas station (They had a lot of those in L.A) A creepy looking woman with a ridiculous amount of make-up on shot her an ugly look. Bean glared back. She casually walked up to a small selection of hairbrushes. Why do they sell hairbrushes at gas stations? I don’t know. She picked one and darted towards the exit.
“HEY! YOU LITTLE SNOT- FACED #$%@#!!!!!’ the woman hollered. “Don’t you think you can go stealing my products!” she advanced threateningly towards Bean. Ban knew she would have to do some quick thinking. Very quick thinking.
She quickly ran the brush through her hair several times, and then looked up innocently.
“Oops! I’m afraid I forgot to pay for this!” she said sweetly.
“Well you better!”
“I’d like to, but I can’t afford it. I should put it back, even though I have a terribly infectious disease on my head. At random times it gets all flaky and all my hair falls out and my head gets full of blisters. If I scratch it, it starts bleeding profusely. It’s very gross and contagious.” She offered the hair brush back to the woman. “You can have it back though, if you want.”
“EW!” the woman turned a several shadows of green and stepped back a few feet. “Get that rotting carcass scalp of yours out of my gas station! AND DON’T COME BACK, YA MOOCHER!”
Bean darted back and finished brushing her hair right outside the gas station, until it had resumed its normal state of gorgeous goldenness. There. Now she could figure out what to do.
It was then that she realized her mom would come looking for her. And she would find her somehow. Bean shuddered, imagining what her mom would do when she found her daughter. No, best she RAN THE HECK AWAY! Started a new life, in a new state, with a new nickname. She didn’t know her real name anyways. Bean decided that her new name would be Pepper. Why? She didn’t know, but pepper sounded cool. Yes, that was her new name. Bag Bean.
Pepper now needed to get to Texas. She sat on a graffiti bench and thought. Suddenly a fat hobo who smelled strongly of whiskey came over to her. He was swaying and waddling.
“Hey pretty lady won’t you gimme a siiiggnnn” he sang, sitting down next to her.
“EW!” Pepper jumped up and ran down the street and sat down to a random old woman on another bench. The woman smelled like pennies, all metallic, and had a nearly bald cat sitting on her lap.
“MRRRREEEEEOOOOWWWWWWWW” As it yawned, Pepper noticed it only had one tooth, which was a dull shade of grey. Ew. L.A was weird.
“So,” the old woman said, smiling. Her teeth weren’t dull grey but bright yellow. Pepper counted them. She had exactly 4, one of which had a hole in it as if someone had shot it.
“… So.” Pepper said back.
“Where you headed?”
“What do you mean?” how did the woman know Pepper was going somewhere.
“Texas? Oh, how nice. Texas is a nice state. I like Texas.”
“Um, that’s very interesting.”
“Well, Pepper…” the old woman put her hand on Pepper’s shoulder. Pepper shied away. OMYGOSH! THE WOMAN’S HAND WAS GLUED TO PEPPER’S SHOULDER!
(to be continued maybe)
Bean rushed into a gas station (They had a lot of those in L.A) A creepy looking woman with a ridiculous amount of make-up on shot her an ugly look. Bean glared back. She casually walked up to a small selection of hairbrushes. Why do they sell hairbrushes at gas stations? I don’t know. She picked one and darted towards the exit.
“HEY! YOU LITTLE SNOT- FACED #$%@#!!!!!’ the woman hollered. “Don’t you think you can go stealing my products!” she advanced threateningly towards Bean. Ban knew she would have to do some quick thinking. Very quick thinking.
She quickly ran the brush through her hair several times, and then looked up innocently.
“Oops! I’m afraid I forgot to pay for this!” she said sweetly.
“Well you better!”
“I’d like to, but I can’t afford it. I should put it back, even though I have a terribly infectious disease on my head. At random times it gets all flaky and all my hair falls out and my head gets full of blisters. If I scratch it, it starts bleeding profusely. It’s very gross and contagious.” She offered the hair brush back to the woman. “You can have it back though, if you want.”
“EW!” the woman turned a several shadows of green and stepped back a few feet. “Get that rotting carcass scalp of yours out of my gas station! AND DON’T COME BACK, YA MOOCHER!”
Bean darted back and finished brushing her hair right outside the gas station, until it had resumed its normal state of gorgeous goldenness. There. Now she could figure out what to do.
It was then that she realized her mom would come looking for her. And she would find her somehow. Bean shuddered, imagining what her mom would do when she found her daughter. No, best she RAN THE HECK AWAY! Started a new life, in a new state, with a new nickname. She didn’t know her real name anyways. Bean decided that her new name would be Pepper. Why? She didn’t know, but pepper sounded cool. Yes, that was her new name. Bag Bean.
Pepper now needed to get to Texas. She sat on a graffiti bench and thought. Suddenly a fat hobo who smelled strongly of whiskey came over to her. He was swaying and waddling.
“Hey pretty lady won’t you gimme a siiiggnnn” he sang, sitting down next to her.
“EW!” Pepper jumped up and ran down the street and sat down to a random old woman on another bench. The woman smelled like pennies, all metallic, and had a nearly bald cat sitting on her lap.
“MRRRREEEEEOOOOWWWWWWWW” As it yawned, Pepper noticed it only had one tooth, which was a dull shade of grey. Ew. L.A was weird.
“So,” the old woman said, smiling. Her teeth weren’t dull grey but bright yellow. Pepper counted them. She had exactly 4, one of which had a hole in it as if someone had shot it.
“… So.” Pepper said back.
“Where you headed?”
“What do you mean?” how did the woman know Pepper was going somewhere.
“Texas? Oh, how nice. Texas is a nice state. I like Texas.”
“Um, that’s very interesting.”
“Well, Pepper…” the old woman put her hand on Pepper’s shoulder. Pepper shied away. OMYGOSH! THE WOMAN’S HAND WAS GLUED TO PEPPER’S SHOULDER!
(to be continued maybe)
Thursday, March 11, 2010
I GOTTED BORED 8D
Okay, uhm... I haven't updated the blog in CENTURIES because I cant figure up how to upload the stupid pictures on the camera, so I'll put this story instead. I was REALLY bored and just started putting epically random things. This is chapter one lol.
She sat in her darkened, cold office-prison, pencil suspended in the air above a piece of paper, thinking hard. The last beatings had sent her reeling, and she couldn’t think of something to write. But if her mother came in and saw her not writing, she would certainly be cruelly beaten to death. Her mind raced to find something to write, ANYTHING would be better than nothing… She chewed on the tip of the pencil, then accidentally swallowed the lead and choked on it. She gasped (or at least attempted to) as the poisonous metal grated against her throat, tearing it. Finally she managed to swallow it. Great, now she could be poisoned. And she didn’t have a pencil.
Suddenly, the door cricked open. The author whipped around with a gasp of horror. Her mother stood there, glaring darkly at her.
“BEAN!” she said. The author cringed at the name. It wasn’t her real one and she had been trying hard to forget it. Who even came up with that name anyways? It made NO SENSE!
“Hello, Mother.” Bean whimpered, smiling submissively. It was then that she guessed she had pencil lead all over her teeth.
“Have you been eating your pencils?” hissed her mother, getting right next to her face and whispering angrily like she tended to do. Not bothering to hear the answer, she slapped Bean so hard that she collapsed onto the ground.
“Get up, you ungrateful wretch and let me see what you’ve written!” Bean felt a sharp pain in her side as her mother kicked her. She dragged herself up, using the desk as a support, and shakily gave her mom the paper.
“YOU FOOL!” her mother hollered, shaking the whole house with her loudness. “You’ve written NOTHING! NOTHING AT ALL!”
“I-…”
“Don’t you sass at me, young lady!” her mother grabbed a random brick that was just sitting on the floor and winged it at her. Bean screamed and ducked, and the brick sailed over her head. It crashed into the window, shattering it.
Ignoring her mother’s bellows of rage, Bean jumped out without hesitation. LITTLE DID SHE REALIZE IT WAS 5 STORIES UP!!!! She fell and fell until she finally crashed onto the ground. SNAP! Oh, there went her leg. And 5 ribs. Oh, no, that was just the pile of roses she landed on. She flinched, trying to pull some of the thorns that had embedded themselves deep into her flesh.
Her mother was perched at the window. SUDDENLY SHE JUMPED OUT. Bean watched her mother falling. Of course, the woman landed perfectly on her feet and stood without a scratch. She opened her mouth and literally hissed at Bean, raising her hands claw-like. Bean gave a little squeak and darted to the side. Her mother gave chase.
Bean ran right into a crowded Los Angeles road (How did she get to Los Angeles anyways?) and dodged between the many cars of drugged hobos. Her mother does not have as awesomely quick reflexes. Bean watches in satisfaction as her mother is hit by a car. She clings to the hood, screeching, but is dragged away.
“Bye, Mom.” Bean says, and dashes into the sea of buildings. She trots around, utterly lost. Her mother would never let her out of their backyard, and even then she was on a leash. A LEASH!!!! Bean tripped over the curb and fell flat on her face randomly. She picked herself up bitterly.
“Hey you!” A young man (okay an emo kid; he doesn’t deserve to be called a young man) of about 16 came up to her. Bean scowled at him. He had those weird earrings that made your earlobes all big, a ridiculous hairdo, and skinny jeans. Her favorite.
“What do you want?” she snapped, having no patience for nancy emo kids.
“You dropped this.” The emo kid handed her a gleaming knife, about 6 inches long. It was covered in drops of what looks suspiciously like blood. Her mom wouldn’t have let her touch a butter knife, much less a 6-inch blade, so this certainly wasn’t hers.
“Oh my goodness!” she gasped, grabbing it. “I would be so upset if I lost it! Thank you!”
The emo kid smiled, and she smiled back, which was very hard considering she wanted to run screaming in the other direction. Emo boy also handed her a sash and belt for the knife. Then he put his hands in his hoody, assumed a tortured face, turned heel, and walked away.
Bean just stood there, gawking. What could she do with a knife, especially such an awesome one anyways? And where did that kid get ahold of such a weapon, and why did he give it to her? Oh well, she didn’t really care. At all. Because her hair was badly messed up.
She sat in her darkened, cold office-prison, pencil suspended in the air above a piece of paper, thinking hard. The last beatings had sent her reeling, and she couldn’t think of something to write. But if her mother came in and saw her not writing, she would certainly be cruelly beaten to death. Her mind raced to find something to write, ANYTHING would be better than nothing… She chewed on the tip of the pencil, then accidentally swallowed the lead and choked on it. She gasped (or at least attempted to) as the poisonous metal grated against her throat, tearing it. Finally she managed to swallow it. Great, now she could be poisoned. And she didn’t have a pencil.
Suddenly, the door cricked open. The author whipped around with a gasp of horror. Her mother stood there, glaring darkly at her.
“BEAN!” she said. The author cringed at the name. It wasn’t her real one and she had been trying hard to forget it. Who even came up with that name anyways? It made NO SENSE!
“Hello, Mother.” Bean whimpered, smiling submissively. It was then that she guessed she had pencil lead all over her teeth.
“Have you been eating your pencils?” hissed her mother, getting right next to her face and whispering angrily like she tended to do. Not bothering to hear the answer, she slapped Bean so hard that she collapsed onto the ground.
“Get up, you ungrateful wretch and let me see what you’ve written!” Bean felt a sharp pain in her side as her mother kicked her. She dragged herself up, using the desk as a support, and shakily gave her mom the paper.
“YOU FOOL!” her mother hollered, shaking the whole house with her loudness. “You’ve written NOTHING! NOTHING AT ALL!”
“I-…”
“Don’t you sass at me, young lady!” her mother grabbed a random brick that was just sitting on the floor and winged it at her. Bean screamed and ducked, and the brick sailed over her head. It crashed into the window, shattering it.
Ignoring her mother’s bellows of rage, Bean jumped out without hesitation. LITTLE DID SHE REALIZE IT WAS 5 STORIES UP!!!! She fell and fell until she finally crashed onto the ground. SNAP! Oh, there went her leg. And 5 ribs. Oh, no, that was just the pile of roses she landed on. She flinched, trying to pull some of the thorns that had embedded themselves deep into her flesh.
Her mother was perched at the window. SUDDENLY SHE JUMPED OUT. Bean watched her mother falling. Of course, the woman landed perfectly on her feet and stood without a scratch. She opened her mouth and literally hissed at Bean, raising her hands claw-like. Bean gave a little squeak and darted to the side. Her mother gave chase.
Bean ran right into a crowded Los Angeles road (How did she get to Los Angeles anyways?) and dodged between the many cars of drugged hobos. Her mother does not have as awesomely quick reflexes. Bean watches in satisfaction as her mother is hit by a car. She clings to the hood, screeching, but is dragged away.
“Bye, Mom.” Bean says, and dashes into the sea of buildings. She trots around, utterly lost. Her mother would never let her out of their backyard, and even then she was on a leash. A LEASH!!!! Bean tripped over the curb and fell flat on her face randomly. She picked herself up bitterly.
“Hey you!” A young man (okay an emo kid; he doesn’t deserve to be called a young man) of about 16 came up to her. Bean scowled at him. He had those weird earrings that made your earlobes all big, a ridiculous hairdo, and skinny jeans. Her favorite.
“What do you want?” she snapped, having no patience for nancy emo kids.
“You dropped this.” The emo kid handed her a gleaming knife, about 6 inches long. It was covered in drops of what looks suspiciously like blood. Her mom wouldn’t have let her touch a butter knife, much less a 6-inch blade, so this certainly wasn’t hers.
“Oh my goodness!” she gasped, grabbing it. “I would be so upset if I lost it! Thank you!”
The emo kid smiled, and she smiled back, which was very hard considering she wanted to run screaming in the other direction. Emo boy also handed her a sash and belt for the knife. Then he put his hands in his hoody, assumed a tortured face, turned heel, and walked away.
Bean just stood there, gawking. What could she do with a knife, especially such an awesome one anyways? And where did that kid get ahold of such a weapon, and why did he give it to her? Oh well, she didn’t really care. At all. Because her hair was badly messed up.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Saturday, February 13, 2010
VAL-VAL!
It's almost Valentine's day! Which isn't Valentine's birthday (She was born in like September) ut since she's named that I thought I'd put this up anyways.
This is an old pic I just wanted to show you how skinny she used to be.. This was actually after she gained some weight.
OMG SHE IS SO CUTES
America's awesommest picture
Okay, after I showed off my kitty-cat... I think she might be pregnant! 8D She's getting like super fat all of a sudden after... Mysteriously disappearing. *cough* So yeah, I think she's pregnant. I'll get a picture of her fatness later but if she does have kittens, I'm guessing they'll be in like late March or April.
This is an old pic I just wanted to show you how skinny she used to be.. This was actually after she gained some weight.
OMG SHE IS SO CUTES
America's awesommest picture
Okay, after I showed off my kitty-cat... I think she might be pregnant! 8D She's getting like super fat all of a sudden after... Mysteriously disappearing. *cough* So yeah, I think she's pregnant. I'll get a picture of her fatness later but if she does have kittens, I'm guessing they'll be in like late March or April.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
The night I was killed...
I was lalalaing gossiping about my brother to my friend, and I was cracking up, so my brother, let's call him J, came in and yelled at me to know what I was writing about. I screamed back that it was nunna his business. Then he attacked me and we got in a little fight, me screaming to go away the whole time, which left me shaking cuz I AM REALLY HUNGRY.
So then I heard him mutter "That's it" and I heard his airsoft gun being filled with ammo, then him search for random things, then it got quiet...
I was still on the computer.
Then the office light was turned off. heard the rattle of his gun and the jingle of the keys in his pocket, a telltale sign J was coming.
Then I saw a hand reach forward and turn off the computer. It was PITCH BLACK now. Then a red light shone from his forhead onto my face. He was wearing that weird headlight. It was really bright, so that it hurt my eyes.
"Where's my knife?!?" he yelled.
"WHY WOULD I HAVE IT?" I yelled back, even though it was sitting on my dresser. He had dropped it and I had kept it.
"GIVE ME MY KNIFE!" he yelled loudly.
"OKAY! I HAFTA GET IT FIRST!"
"THEN GET IT!"
I got up, stumbling through the inky blackness to my room. He followed a few feet away, his gun up. The red light on hi forhead enchanted me. I couldn't look away for fear he'd dash off and look at what I had gossipped about him. Or maybe he'd push me or something.
I made it wakling backwards through the dark into my room and fumbled for the knife. I gave it to him and tried to push back, to escape back into the black halls.
He wouldn't let me. "I have to put it in my pocket." he said, taking his sweet time doing it.
As soon as I could, I raced back here.
I was shaking for like ten minutes, because I am freakishly hungry, not from fear lol. It was the most entertaining thing I had all week.
So then I heard him mutter "That's it" and I heard his airsoft gun being filled with ammo, then him search for random things, then it got quiet...
I was still on the computer.
Then the office light was turned off. heard the rattle of his gun and the jingle of the keys in his pocket, a telltale sign J was coming.
Then I saw a hand reach forward and turn off the computer. It was PITCH BLACK now. Then a red light shone from his forhead onto my face. He was wearing that weird headlight. It was really bright, so that it hurt my eyes.
"Where's my knife?!?" he yelled.
"WHY WOULD I HAVE IT?" I yelled back, even though it was sitting on my dresser. He had dropped it and I had kept it.
"GIVE ME MY KNIFE!" he yelled loudly.
"OKAY! I HAFTA GET IT FIRST!"
"THEN GET IT!"
I got up, stumbling through the inky blackness to my room. He followed a few feet away, his gun up. The red light on hi forhead enchanted me. I couldn't look away for fear he'd dash off and look at what I had gossipped about him. Or maybe he'd push me or something.
I made it wakling backwards through the dark into my room and fumbled for the knife. I gave it to him and tried to push back, to escape back into the black halls.
He wouldn't let me. "I have to put it in my pocket." he said, taking his sweet time doing it.
As soon as I could, I raced back here.
I was shaking for like ten minutes, because I am freakishly hungry, not from fear lol. It was the most entertaining thing I had all week.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
I'm bored! HUZZZAH!
So yeah, I'm posting pics from like 2006 and 2005 I found randomly. (note how none are of me)
Shadows. dancers! *starts singing cheesy movie song for some cheesy tv show she suddenly remembers*
Iylee (sp)... You have your ears pierced. Wow.
O_O Ricky the spineless coward. LOL!
Dylan is so cute when he was 6!
And if yuu look closely, you can see the writhing, dying spawn of that dead wasp in the background.
Dylan is murdered by the blue thinnnngggg. Bob is incredibly hyped on the snacks she ate at the superbowl dseal and therefore must commentate EVERYTHING!
(His shirt, btw, says "Chill" and has a guy in an ice cube)
I love putting pictures of Jacob up there. tehehe..
*shudders* this picture will torment me forever. I shall always be frightened... I thought they were real... UGH!
Aunt Jenny! HAHAHAHAHA I HAVE A PICTURE OF YOU *laughs maniacaly* I wonder if that crick still has water...
OMG SO CUTES!
Random hobo kid who we trapped in our backyard. We released her after we tagged her.
Forrest is a babe.
Shadows. dancers! *starts singing cheesy movie song for some cheesy tv show she suddenly remembers*
Iylee (sp)... You have your ears pierced. Wow.
O_O Ricky the spineless coward. LOL!
Dylan is so cute when he was 6!
And if yuu look closely, you can see the writhing, dying spawn of that dead wasp in the background.
Dylan is murdered by the blue thinnnngggg. Bob is incredibly hyped on the snacks she ate at the superbowl dseal and therefore must commentate EVERYTHING!
(His shirt, btw, says "Chill" and has a guy in an ice cube)
I love putting pictures of Jacob up there. tehehe..
*shudders* this picture will torment me forever. I shall always be frightened... I thought they were real... UGH!
Aunt Jenny! HAHAHAHAHA I HAVE A PICTURE OF YOU *laughs maniacaly* I wonder if that crick still has water... 
OMG SO CUTES!
Random hobo kid who we trapped in our backyard. We released her after we tagged her.
Forrest is a babe.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
PART TWO OF STORY TIME YAY
This one is for Ricky. yeah. Wrote it several years ago.
As I looked out the window of my limousine, I saw a small plume of smoke. It was kind of pathetic, but I knew it could quickly spread. So I ordered my chauffeur to stop the car and Frank, a man who had no point in life except to open the door for me, to let me out. I stepped out and checked on my 10 pedigree thoroughbred horses. They were fine. I took one out and mounted him, trotting towards the smoke. I soon saw it's source, and the scene just wrenched my heart.
There was a man trying to get a fire going on the cold day. His jacket was thin and ragged, with no buttons or zipper and holes in the elbow. His shirt was stained with grease and blood, and the bottoms of his pants were shreds. There was a huge black spot on his thigh - no knowing what THAT was - and there were holes in his knees too. I hastily looked down at my expensive riding outfit, making sure it didn't suddenly change into a pile of rags. This guy could really use a couple hundred bucks. Or maybe a thousand.
I dismounted and sent my professionally trained horse back to the trailer,then began rooting through my wallet. The man still hadn't noticed me.
Suddenly, his pathetic fire seemed to explode in a fiery ball, spitting flames onto his jeans. He screamed in pain and hopped around, dumping what looked like the inside of a filthy water bottle on his leg. the flames went out, leaving an ugly, open wound on his leg. Now he was hurt and had no fire on this freezing day. I kept rooting through my swollen wallet and pulled out a million dollar bill. I would give him this. It would not be a problem to me; I had 30 of them in my wallet alone. The man began to cry, tears squeezing out of his blue eyes and rolling down his dirt-blackened cheeks. I wanted to cry too. His hair was so dirty that I couldn't even tell what color it was.
"Ahem" I said, and the man looked up. He jumped with a little gasp of fear when he saw my 12 attack dogs circling me, but didn't say anything. Suddenly, his eyes brightened. Then he laughed. Hmm, it was a familiar laugh.
"Hey, noob" he said. I almost died! Fury rushed through me. It was Jacob, my old brother! The one who always called me a noob. He was not to get a single penny from me!I turned heel and stomped away, leaving him to sit in the rubble of his own noobishness.
As I looked out the window of my limousine, I saw a small plume of smoke. It was kind of pathetic, but I knew it could quickly spread. So I ordered my chauffeur to stop the car and Frank, a man who had no point in life except to open the door for me, to let me out. I stepped out and checked on my 10 pedigree thoroughbred horses. They were fine. I took one out and mounted him, trotting towards the smoke. I soon saw it's source, and the scene just wrenched my heart.
There was a man trying to get a fire going on the cold day. His jacket was thin and ragged, with no buttons or zipper and holes in the elbow. His shirt was stained with grease and blood, and the bottoms of his pants were shreds. There was a huge black spot on his thigh - no knowing what THAT was - and there were holes in his knees too. I hastily looked down at my expensive riding outfit, making sure it didn't suddenly change into a pile of rags. This guy could really use a couple hundred bucks. Or maybe a thousand.
I dismounted and sent my professionally trained horse back to the trailer,then began rooting through my wallet. The man still hadn't noticed me.
Suddenly, his pathetic fire seemed to explode in a fiery ball, spitting flames onto his jeans. He screamed in pain and hopped around, dumping what looked like the inside of a filthy water bottle on his leg. the flames went out, leaving an ugly, open wound on his leg. Now he was hurt and had no fire on this freezing day. I kept rooting through my swollen wallet and pulled out a million dollar bill. I would give him this. It would not be a problem to me; I had 30 of them in my wallet alone. The man began to cry, tears squeezing out of his blue eyes and rolling down his dirt-blackened cheeks. I wanted to cry too. His hair was so dirty that I couldn't even tell what color it was.
"Ahem" I said, and the man looked up. He jumped with a little gasp of fear when he saw my 12 attack dogs circling me, but didn't say anything. Suddenly, his eyes brightened. Then he laughed. Hmm, it was a familiar laugh.
"Hey, noob" he said. I almost died! Fury rushed through me. It was Jacob, my old brother! The one who always called me a noob. He was not to get a single penny from me!I turned heel and stomped away, leaving him to sit in the rubble of his own noobishness.
My origional trademark story:
Look for more soon! I wrote this back in 2006.
Oodle and Doodle were testing their invention - Fire Juice. Their idea was to make a juice that would light a fire without the hassle of striking a match. Their test was dropping a few drops of the Fire Juice and seeing how well it burned.
"I'm a little scared", admitted Oodle.
His sister glared at him. "We already know that it won't spread off the paper", she snapped. "The only way we can start a fire is by dumping it all over the clubhouse."
Oodle hung his head. "I don't know", he sniffled.
Doodle felt sorry for being so rude. "I'm sorry", she said, giving Oodle a playful shove.
But that shove was a little too hard and Oodle lost his balance and landed on the tub of Fire Juice, spilling it everywhere! The juice burst into flames.
When Doodle said "it wouldn't spread", she was wrong. The fire raged all over, blocking the door and the windows.
Smoke filled their lungs, and they died.
The End.
Oodle and Doodle were testing their invention - Fire Juice. Their idea was to make a juice that would light a fire without the hassle of striking a match. Their test was dropping a few drops of the Fire Juice and seeing how well it burned.
"I'm a little scared", admitted Oodle.
His sister glared at him. "We already know that it won't spread off the paper", she snapped. "The only way we can start a fire is by dumping it all over the clubhouse."
Oodle hung his head. "I don't know", he sniffled.
Doodle felt sorry for being so rude. "I'm sorry", she said, giving Oodle a playful shove.
But that shove was a little too hard and Oodle lost his balance and landed on the tub of Fire Juice, spilling it everywhere! The juice burst into flames.
When Doodle said "it wouldn't spread", she was wrong. The fire raged all over, blocking the door and the windows.
Smoke filled their lungs, and they died.
The End.
Monday, January 25, 2010
PS. I DID SEE THIS!
Haven, Mom, if you're reading this and disagree you were asleep. I remember that road RIGHT THERE, and Pa commenting on how he hoped we had enough gas, and being like totally amazed. Maddy claims we most certainly did not see it but WE DID! It just wasn't as dramatic looking.
AWESOME PICTURES!
These are some pictures... I don't know why I put them up. Because I loff them. SO LOOK!
Self-proclaimed Jacob Hasselhoff. I'm sorry, I had to put this picture up. I just love it.
The koehlers... We are a weird herd. Very weird.
Ew. She is slimy.
Luna is living it up! And Serens is hyper and so shall comment on every picture!
Me and Luna being awesome at the beach.
Finally! I come to a town where the people are REAL!
(Who the heck is this cat?) Fredricksburg shop resident dude/cat/owner/cookie.
Luna looks silly. HA!
And if you look very closely you can see the ninja redneck in the trees. These are actually quite rare but definatly easy to spot if you know how to look. This one is climbing a tree for the sheer heck of it. You can tell because of the haughtiness in his gaze and the way he is already trying to get down. Trying. (sorry Jake, I'm just joking.)
Uh..... Wow.
I was trying to get the cat, in my pajamas, and he was out of armsreach. I tried to kick him. I failed.
REEK! REEK! REEK! OBAMADUCK! The feathers of change...
*has nightmares* Why did I take a picture of THAT?! That is FREAKY! Oh my gosh... Wow.
A really bad picture of Valentine.
Jack puking.
SUPAH PANDA WOMAN LEaP DA BUILDING!
SUPA LONESTARR LUNA DOGGY LEAP DA BUILDING!
My pathetic attempt at a jump. Hey, she jumped over it ok?
Val looks really crabby in this picture but she was actually purring so top hating me. No idea what it says on the back.
backflip boi. love spelling things wrong
Prolly my fave pic ever, Luna eating brocolli. Wow.
Self-proclaimed Jacob Hasselhoff. I'm sorry, I had to put this picture up. I just love it.
The koehlers... We are a weird herd. Very weird.
Ew. She is slimy.
Luna is living it up! And Serens is hyper and so shall comment on every picture!
Me and Luna being awesome at the beach.
Finally! I come to a town where the people are REAL!
(Who the heck is this cat?) Fredricksburg shop resident dude/cat/owner/cookie.
Luna looks silly. HA!
And if you look very closely you can see the ninja redneck in the trees. These are actually quite rare but definatly easy to spot if you know how to look. This one is climbing a tree for the sheer heck of it. You can tell because of the haughtiness in his gaze and the way he is already trying to get down. Trying. (sorry Jake, I'm just joking.)
Uh..... Wow.
I was trying to get the cat, in my pajamas, and he was out of armsreach. I tried to kick him. I failed.
REEK! REEK! REEK! OBAMADUCK! The feathers of change...
*has nightmares* Why did I take a picture of THAT?! That is FREAKY! Oh my gosh... Wow.
A really bad picture of Valentine.
Jack puking.
SUPAH PANDA WOMAN LEaP DA BUILDING!
SUPA LONESTARR LUNA DOGGY LEAP DA BUILDING!
My pathetic attempt at a jump. Hey, she jumped over it ok?
Val looks really crabby in this picture but she was actually purring so top hating me. No idea what it says on the back.
backflip boi. love spelling things wrong
Prolly my fave pic ever, Luna eating brocolli. Wow.
Sunday, January 17, 2010
JA JA JAAAAAAA
Look at the dancing man! YAYS! His name is Erick, and he's awesome. NOTE: I did not draw Erick.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Drama photos! *shiny font*
YAY! Dramatic photos LOL! I like taking dramatic pictures even though the camera rlly stinks. BLAH. So yeah, just felt liek being random so here:
*retch*
Haven is like my pet when I take dramatic photos. See all below and you'll know what I mean.
(ok that's me whatever)
(annnd that's a flower...)
(SEE! SEE! RIGHT THERE! okay I'm done)
My fave
Alright, I'm done lol.
(this one is not dramatic, just very amusing.)
*retch*
Haven is like my pet when I take dramatic photos. See all below and you'll know what I mean.
(ok that's me whatever)
(annnd that's a flower...)
(SEE! SEE! RIGHT THERE! okay I'm done)
My fave
Alright, I'm done lol.
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